Time Capsule/Frankenstein Love Letter...or: I never throw away anything written to me

I was looking, tonight, through a dusty box of old poetry; trying to select enough tasty morsels to read to a captive audience (I have a reading on November 18th). Within that dusty box, there was an entire history recorded, cryptically. Some of the things I wrote should not only be thrown away, they should be burned and the ashes should be stomped on, scooped up, and tossed over the edge of a cliff. But, alas, I can't do it.

In fact, I'd rather humiliate myself a little more by sharing a few things here. Oh, why not.

I'll start by sharing a strange creation of mine. I can't call it a poem. I didn't write a lick of it. Way back in the dawn of time, people used to write actual physical tangible letters to each other. There were folds and creases and handwriting quirks and doodles in the margins, tear drop stains and lipstick streaks. Well, I took a bunch of letters written by friends and family, cut them all up and pieced them back together into a freakish Frankenstien letter to my 19 year-old self.  Don't strain your eyes trying to read these! I'll type it all out for your amusement! It's been over 15 yrs since folks wrote these words to me. Some are no longer alive. Some are lost to me in other ways. But I have their crazy, wonderful, earnest and silly longings and wishes in this time capsule to myself.  

July 5, 1994 Tuesday Morning

Dear Madona, Dearest Niece Madona, Hey Tyler, Ty, To Tyler from Jon-Boy,

After you're rich and famous, I'll say

Same people, same places

Did I tell you that Aurielle lost her two front teeth on the bottom?

I can hold a pencil in my fingers.

...and I can't. Isn't that unfair? You can work 4 days a week at the club and you don't think that bothers me? But I don't say I have no respect for you. I love & respect you.

my period is very irregular lately

and the radio said Lollapalooza was rained out

Mike sounds soooooo cute, I think that blond hair and

my theory that rap music is a communist  plot to weaken the infrastructure of American society

backbites her own children, Ok? Try to give the person the benefit

computer you ganked from the family. Why you little devil.

When we were fixing to take the boys back swimming he gave me

fast cars, a nice house, a couple of rug rats, a small harem, and to in general just be happy

the children put on plays, skits, sings and dances

but we claim healing in the name of Jesus!

What do you want from life? Well, besides sex

go down the river in Mason's boat. That's one of my favorite things

and not be so possessive, I will promise to be everything to you, including your future

I do worry about you

(one was killed by a pack of dogs) then the dog catcher

He made the Dean's List.

I came into the theater today looking for a job. Do you remember?

I have emotional problems

I would rather call you Madona, but if you like Tyler I will call you that. Sometimes I call myself Chicken Wang

Cold Cold in MN tonight

you haven't found you a fella yet! there has to be one nice single cute man in Minnesota

Well we got to the beach last night, however, I never left Lake Butler

We stood on the front porch last night and watched fireworks. They were mostly duds.

watched a movie and later that night called and said you would have kissed me if I had tried

don't strike me down with your wrath

1995 will be the best

incredible friendship and relationship. I'm ready to commit myself

Forgive me for getting pissed off

housework keeps me hopping

I have the feeling you're a booty call. I like Bryan, he's nice, but 

Hot! We need the rain

Don't lead me on or use me as a security blanket

From Will The Temp Guy reading the Barbara Kingsolver book, Grandma, Love, Erica M. Freeman, I love you, Jon, Dawnnita, Your Friend, Travis, Love Always, Aunt Beth, Cousin Fritz and Cousin Biener, Love Jay, Love always and forever, Mommy, Aurielle and Smokey, Love you, Granny Erlene, Always Friends, Leslie, Love & Hugs, Shannon, Love ya honey, Mary, Love, Aunt Peg

P.S. If the pictures do not arrive soon I shall gather my tools of torture (handcuffs, whips, etc.)

P.P.S. Everyone says hi and sends their love. 

Home-made Hokey-ness

Dear Blog,
I've missed you so.
The week/days leading up to Christmas have been abundantly full of festivities: Cookie Exchange. Field trip to the Gingerbread exhibit. Thrift store treasure-hunting.
I tried to make as many of my own gifts as possible...or to give gifts that are experiential or consumable.
I couldn't write about what I've been up to, because I didn't want to reveal any gifts before Christmas. You see, I fool myself into thinking that people actually read this blog! I know I'm mostly just talking to myself. But that's ok. Really.
Anyways, now that all of the presnts have been unwrapped, I can reveal without spoiling anything.
This year, I totally had time to do all of this:
1) Bake Coconut Macaroons, Cranberry White Chocolate Cookies, Oatmeal Chocolate Chip cookies, pack them off and ship them to Florida in time for pre-Christmas munching. Then I discovered that the Coconut Macaroons are really fantastic dipped in chocolate...and so more macaroons were toasted and dipped for other gifts.  
2) I made jam for the first time ever. Strawberry Champagne Jam. Also, Pumpkin Butter. Those were given as gifts too. The jam has a beautiful, vivid color. But, my, oh my, is it ever sweet. I have warned everyone that they may just want to use it as syrup. Next time, I will use less sugar than the recipe calls for. I don't want someone's onset of diabetes to be on my conscience.

3) I made Kaluha Body Scrubs and Lavendar Lemon Cookie Body Scrubs as presents. Michael and I had a silky smooth slippery evening trying those out. We determined that they are Pure Awesomeness and that every couple should do the same. Really, they exfoiliate your skin, smooth rough spots, all while indulging in a delicious aroma-therapy experience. And they are edible and romantic. I think these scrubs are my favorite experiment so far!
4) I created some Man-lets for some manly/metro men in my life. Also made bracelets and earrings and necklaces for several lovely ladies. Many of my beads were from my jewelry and refashioned into new stuff...like beads from bracelets turned into adorable earrings. The earrings and bracelet I made for my mom were from beads I bought off a monk...which you can read about in one of my previous posts (Namaste Beads).
5) I put together a felt board for Noah and created some felt creatures and shapes- Christmas themed- Frosty, a Christmas tree with ornaments and a star. And an underwater scene with a whale, octopus, and starfish.
6) I put together a dress up box for Noah from scarves, ties, and old hats from the thrift store.
7) I made some of my own wrapping paper out of Noah's fingerpaintings and other art.
8) I put together a book of my poetry and photos I have taken...mostly of Noah or nature pics.

Overall, it was very satisfying for me as the Giver to be able to make these things instead of shop. However, I don't know how the Receivers feel! Sure, sure, they all said thanks and smiled...but would they have rather received a tie or a candle or a gift card? I don't know?!
Another thing... it can be very time consuming to make gifts. I have the time right now, so no biggie, but when I go back to work or have another kid, time will be a little tougher to come by.

I must say that I was given some terrific gifts made by my Aunt Beth. She's been sending her own creations for a few years now, and they are TREASURES!  This year she made an amazing book for me...she took a philosophy book and "reclaimed" it with collage art, lovely pieces of lace, doors and flaps that open... The book has a gardening theme, so she included bits of wisdom and herbology throughout...and even packets of seeds. It is so detailed and personalized. Inspiring! I will have to photograph the book and post pics on this here blog. You just may swoon.
My gift creations weren't nearly as inspiring. But, to be fair to myself, I am still in the learning phase of craftiness. Aunt B is a craft-pro. I'll get better. My creations will become less hokey as I go! Let's hope!

I would love to hear about your experiences giving, receiving, and/or creating presents.
Hope your holiday was joyous!